Comic relief, unhampered thoughts It is not easy to take one's life. In my circumstances a gun would be extremely dificult to come by. Swallowing pills has a large margin of error and one is apt to come to in a hospital bed - stomach pumped and suffering from the most excruciating (not to mention embarrassing) hangover. Slitting one's wrists is painful, so is jumping off a building. Drowning would be simply awful - the desperate fear and panic right before the end, as one's instinct for survival kicks in. As for hanging by a noose, a rope with eight coils really stirs a deep horror within me. What a brutal inelegant instrument.

I suppose one might contrive to be murdered. But really, who wants to be found raped and stabbed in a gutter somewhere? The squalor of the situation would be unimaginable. Could you hire someone to take your own life? But then, you never know when you'd change your mind, and then where would you be? Also, if I could afford to pay someone for my death, I would certainly use it, fake it and go off to live in a new life in a Latin American country.

Labels: sweet misery

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